What’s that guy doing holding his cell phone at arm’s length, like it’s a rancid diaper?
And why is that woman leaning away from her menu with eyes agape, like the blue-plate special is cat?
Gotta be presbyopia.
It’s not a religious disease, like something only Presbyterians catch. Presbyterians may come down with presbyopia, but Methodists, Lutherans and Baptists are equally susceptible.
Presbyopia is a common eyesight problem. It comes from presby (meaning “elder/old man”) and opia (meaning “eye, or having to do with sight”). It’s the slow deterioration of close-up focus. Presbyopia develops when the clear lens of the eye loses its elasticity. Elasticity changes focus, and focus determines whether you order shrimp scampi or sirloin steak.
So he was trying to make out the caller ID, and she was trying to read the menu. And they are like millions of other baby boomers who hold their reading material like God never gave them elbows.
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