Take a Breath, Paul!

This passage is comprised of 267 words, broken up into 12 verses. But in the Greek, it’s all one sentence, and a sentence in which the apostle apparently tries to touch on every conceivable blessing God has to offer!

Let’s have some pity for Starbucks baristas. They must try to interpret orders like these:

• Venti half and half, 10 pumps vanilla, extra whip
• Venti iced skinny hazelnut macchiato, sugar-free syrup, extra shot, light ice, no whip
• Iced, half caff, ristretto, venti, 4-pump, sugar-free, cinnamon, dolce soy skinny latte
• Espresso, iced, with a dollop of foam on top
• Double venti frenchest roast cortado in a plastic cup with extra whipped cream
• 2 volumetric ounces of turbinado sugar, 4 scoops of milk shake mix stuff, 4 shots of espresso, 4-6 ounces of milk,16-ounce cup full of ice, blended, poured into 20-ounce cup, top third of cup filled with cappuccino micro foam

Making sense of this is like trying to read (and understand) Barth’s Commentary on Romans (for an example, see Illustrations below), or a Ph.D. dissertation in geology: Detrital Zircon Evidence for Mixing of Mazatzal Province Age Detritus with Yavapai (ca. 1700-1740 Ma) and Older Detritus in the ca. 1650 Ma...